Good badges for bad jobs.
YOURPROFILE
Put what you’re actually thinking around your face.
Your photo is processed in this browser. Nothing is uploaded unless you publish.
Not affiliated with LinkedIn. Not affiliated with anyone, really.
Filed under
The collection
TRY ON A CONFESSION
Some are GOODGES. Some are BADGES. Recruiters can’t tell the difference either.
Corporate → human
TRANSLATE YOUR HEADLINE.
Paste the line under your name. We’ll tell you what it actually says, and put it around your face. Open the full translator and the buzzword dictionary →
Honest version
Waiting for something passionate…
Live · new
WEAR IT ON CAMERA.
The badge sits on your face and follows it. Throw it across the screen, it comes back. Talk and it says so. Runs in your browser; your camera never leaves it.
- Grab it, throw it
- Profile view
- Filters
- It listens
- 👍 Reactions
- Meeting timer
- Record 5 s
Photo · cover · post
ONE FACE. THREE LIES.
A profile photo, a cover that knows where your head goes, and a post for the feed. Same damage, consistent branding, exact pixel sizes.
Asked by people with jobs
QUESTIONS YOU’D ASK IN THE INTERVIEW.
Is this LinkedIn?
No. GOODGES is not affiliated with, endorsed by or connected to LinkedIn or Microsoft. We just noticed everyone’s profile frame says the same polite thing, and thought it could be more honest.
Do you upload my photo?
No. Your photo is cropped and re-encoded in your browser, and the original never leaves your device. Only if you join the Wall, tick the box and confirm your email, does a small copy of the finished badge get stored. Never the original.
Is it free?
Yes. Every format, every phrase, your own phrase too. Free, like your overtime. If you want to say thanks, there’s a coffee expense claim at the bottom of the page.
Can I write my own phrase?
Yes. Keep it short, keep it legal, and keep phone numbers out of it. It’s a badge, not a classified ad. We fit it to the circle so it never runs off the edge.
What is the Wall?
Everyone who made a GOODGE and said yes, drifting by on one page. Your badge, a name and, if you want, a link to your LinkedIn. Pause or delete it from your account whenever you like and it’s gone at once.
Will recruiters actually see it?
Only if you put it on. Which is, honestly, the whole point.
Will this get me fired?
We can’t promise anything. But “I AM OPEN TO MONEY” has, historically, been true of everyone who has ever had a job.
Or expense him a coffee. Your company won’t notice.
Expense claim#0042
- Item
- 1 × coffee
- Amount
- about €3
- Submitted by
- You, generously
Business justification
Strategic caffeine alignment for Q4.
Opens a tip page in a new tab. Payments are handled there, not here.
The culprit
HI. I DID THIS.
I’m Hayder.
I’ve read more LinkedIn headlines than a recruiter on a deadline.
“Passionate about driving synergies.” “Visionary leader.” “Ex-Google.”
Lies. Beautifully formatted lies.
Nobody gets out of bed for synergies.
Nobody.
You get out of bed for money. And because the cat wants breakfast.
So I built the ring I actually wanted to wear. Then a theme song. Then a 3D button nobody asked for. Then this paragraph, which you’re still reading. Good.
Now, before a recruiter slides into my DMs:
I’m not looking.
I work at Monad Foundation. I like my job. I know. On a site like this, that’s the most shocking confession of all.
GOODGES is a side project. LinkedIn calls that a “serial builder”. My sleep schedule calls it a crime.
(Boss, if you’re reading this: hi. Still not looking. Stop smiling.)
PUT IT IN
WRITING.
Put your professional damage in writing. It takes about a minute and stays in your browser.
Make my GOODGE